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3 Reasons Oral Sex Can Be Painful. by Dxplicits (m): 12:17pm on April 27
Adeniyi Dasola
University of Lagos
300Level, Nigeria.

Cunnilingus is frequently considered an equalizer when it comes to the orgasm gap between men and women.
For those who don’t find cunnilingus pleasurable, however, or worse, find it downright painful, the disappointment and sense of isolation can be just as bad as the bad sex itself. Below are some reasons oral sex can be painful.

1. Trauma from the past
Sexual assault affects hundreds of thousands of women each year, and its impact is sadly long-lasting. Often times a colour, smell, or even someone’s vibe can set off the fight-or-flight triggers in your body, which can have a very real impact on pain in the moment. It can cause your muscles to tense up, specifically in the pelvic floor, which could lead to physical discomfort during sex, oral sex included, long after an assault occurred. Reaching out for counselling or therapy is one way to start healing, but learning how to communicate about your past with a current partner is another important skill.

2. Infection
Any inflammation on the vulvar tissue could cause oral sex to be painful, and several infections do just that. As many of us know all too well, yeast infections can cause significant irritation, often worsened by itching, which could certainly be a culprit. And while gonorrhoea and chlamydia are more often associated with pain during vaginal intercourse, if your partner uses any kind of digital penetration when they perform oral sex, those STIs could be a part of the problem as well.

3. Developing in a sex-negative culture
Whether you had an unusual religious upbringing or a scarring sexual education experience, the way we think about sex affects the way we experience it. If you're worried that having sex is wrong, that fear and anxiety can often tense up the tissues around your vulva and vagina, creating a lot of pain and discomfort. So if you find yourself feeling tense during oral sex in particular and think some psychological discomfort might play a role, don’t hesitate to see a professional.

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