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You are a beautiful young lady but two years ago something happened. You met Dayo at the Students Mission Outreach organised by your campus fellowship. You are surprised that your paths have never crossed on campus but later you understand that he attends the Medical students branch of the fellowship located at the College of Medicine.

You like him a lot but you are not sure the feeling is mutual. You are an introvert and as you quietly observe him, you discover he is outgoing and fun to be with.

You’ve never had a more interesting outreach than this Akwanga mission outreach. Dayo is down to earth and the way he smiles puts you in a relaxed mood. After the outreach, as you stand with the other members beside the uncompleted building that served as the village church waiting for the fellowship bus to arrive, he approaches you. You shake hands with him. He smiles broadly, you smile shyly. He starts the chat. You respond. Soon you are laughing at his jokes and praying the bus breaks down on the road so you can spend more time with him. But God turns deaf ears to your prayers. The bus arrives shortly after that prayer.

Every day , you pass through the College of Medicine on your way to your class. It’s a long distance compared to the short cut you are accustomed to trolling, but you do not mind.

The first week, he is nowhere around the college. You are worried. On one of those days, you search for him all over the college and It wasn’t until the following week that you finally stumble into him. You blush. Your heart beat as he approaches you in his crisp shirt, dark blue tie and well ironed black trousers. Oh yeah, you noticed all that.

You meet him again the following day, and the next. You know the exact time he shows up at the faculty and you arrive just on time. At the general workers meeting, you can’t help but steal glances at him.

Your diary has taken a new shape. Every time you pray to God, asking for a revelation of the man you should marry, you see Dayo. When you open the scriptures, it is Dayo you see. When listening to those inspiring songs, Dayo fills your head. Now, your diary has the word ‘Dayo’ scattered on almost every page.

Dayo will come, a voice whispers. You sigh deeply. Oh Lord, when? You ask.

You start the wedding plans in your head. You are standing on the altar in your white flowing gown and Dayo’s eyes are full of love as he says his vows.

Your wedding night is superb. The kisses and all. The timetable for his meals is set in your mind. He is your King and a king must be well fed. Your outreach meetings, devotions, prayer vigils as a family are not left out. You see the reaction on his face the day your pregnancy test is revealed. He touches your stomach, excited that it is you who carries his seed and not another woman. Like a bucket abandoned under a running tap, your mind is full and overflowing.

Two years later, you are worried he hasn’t said anything to you. Another general outreach is organised and you meet him again but his chat with you is no different from the previous one. It’s the same brother-sister conversation. The following day, you trip as you walk to the stream with the brethren. You glance his way but he is too engrossed in a discussion with the evangelism coordinator to notice that you almost fell. You feel bad about it. Throughout that day, you are moody. He doesn’t notice that too.

As you hand out toiletries to the villagers standing on the queue, You overhear Yinka telling another sister that Rita, your hall representative, is Dayo’s fiancee. They are saying something about the relationship being finally official. You stare at your Hall rep as she walks towards Dayo and stands beside him. You notice how Dayo gaze longingly at her. You can feel the words, the emotions and the connection. You continue to stare at them until she returns to her position at the children section. You wonder what Dayo sees in her. You are a final year accounting student, Rita is a third year religious studies student. It is clear you have more prospects.

You feel like a big stone has been dropped in your heart. Your mind is covered with this dark and thick blanket. You wish you are back in the comfort of your room. As you return your attention to an old woman standing before you in thread bare clothes, you hand her two bars of soap and four sachets of detergents. She smiles at you.

“Oko e nbo lai jina. fun ra e ni simi. God will do your own.”

You look away embarrassed. You are on the verge of tears. She pats your shoulder gently before leaving the queue.

Dayo introduces Rita to you some weeks later and for three days afterwards, you cannot eat. You haven’t gone for lectures either. Every time you see them together, your heart breaks. You refuse to attend any outreach where Dayo will be present.

You have burnt your diary and gradually you are getting him out of your mind. Your friends complain that you have lost weight. You smile. This phase will pass, you mutter to yourself

You wonder how on earth you carried him in your heart for two years. You’ve learnt one of the biggest lesson ever:
ifegrace.com/2018/05/never-feed-emotions-on-assumptions/
@seuncoded

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