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Don’t Lose Yourself In A Relationship. by Happy (f): 4:56am on November 27

There are consequences to being dependent on your relationship
You lose your ability to count on yourself. You should be able to be alone with yourself. There should be things you can do by yourself. It shouldn’t be completely crippling to spend a weekend away from your significant other. And what happens if you ever break up? Do you just stop taking care of yourself? Stop existing? Does the world end? Because it shouldn’t.

Odds are, if you focus all of your energy on one relationship, your other relationships will suffer. This holds true for friends and family. Even the people who love you the most may have a breaking point. Relationships require effort from both people and they can only be one-sided for so long.

Dependence can also cause a lot of internal conflict and harm. If your significant other is able to do things without you, it may feel like they don’t love you as much as you love them. The time they spend with their friends may make you jealous. You may not understand why they need to spend time away. But these feelings are unhealthy. It’s normal for your partner to have friends. It’s normal for them to need time alone. Being too dependent on someone leads to unneeded stress and unhealthy feelings.

How You Can Maintain and Strengthen Your Independence
Be honest with yourself. Can you handle being alone? Can you handle your partner having other friends?

Strengthen all of your relationships. Reach out to family and friends, tell them how you are. Ask them how they are.

Find hobbies that you truly enjoy, even if you don’t have anyone to do them with.

Spend time alone, reflecting. Introspection is valuable.

Know your worth and practice self-care.

Treat your significant other as a friend and a partner. You don’t need them to survive. But you can improve each other and challenge each other. Treat them with respect. Make sure they treat you with respect.

Be open and honest in communication with others and yourself.

And always love yourself.

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